Thanks for your interest in the website reviewer position. We are currently looking for honest people with a keen eye for detail to visit various adult sites online and write the things they like and dislike about each. We will require 12 reviews per week which are due by 2pm every Friday.
The starting wage for this post is $350 per week which rises after 6 months. No previous experience is required for this position. The only requirement we have is that you submit a 100-word review of the members area at a pre-selected site.
Wow. $350 a week for writing about porn. I’ve never had to contemplate the moral standards behind a job opportunity. Am I the kind of person who can go against the advice of society… and mix work with hobbies?
Could I tell my future children I got my start by being a paid pornography reviewer?
Well, yeah, I could. I’d probably even find excuses just to mention it.
The real problem here is the not-so-rigorous standards: "write the things [you] like and dislike about each." I’m pretty passionate about film and photography, and I think the advanced technical terms and analysis in my reviews may escape the average smut surfer. For instance:
"I don’t know about the tits on this chick. I mean, I’ve seen better. Even if not in real life. I live in my parents’ basement."
They probably wouldn’t understand just two sentences of that.
Verdict: Sorry, I’ll PASS.
